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But Honey its a Sensory Issue Posted By: Caliboo818
Posted On: 06/05/2008
How do you get your spouse or others to understand the difference between you'r child not listening in the regular child way, or a behavior due to Autism or what ever disability.Now mind you my husband has know about my son's Autism since day one. He was the one that came home and broke the news to me. But I am the one that does all of the reading, research, talking to parent and watching all of the movements of Autism. Oh I try to explain to him every new thing I discover. It's not like he isnt interested its just all of it gets left up to me, maybe its his way of still dealing oh heck I dont know.

Eric has this issue with tags any kind of tags he hates when they touch his skin and will pull them out of what every he is wearing. I have told other's in this house of this and at times I will forget to pull them off myself.
Now Erica and I have these NBA slippers and I let Eric wear mine not realizing the the tag on the back or thinking it would be and issue he wound up tearing them up by taking off the tags. Was I angry yes but I then had to realize it not a thing he does on purpose so I tried to explain to him that he cant do that. Now last night Erica let him use her slippers after he had a shower I go into the room sigh the same thing I told hubby he hit the roof, I left and went and told Erica she was not upset she made light of it, but I could hear hubby yelling, he was asking Eric why he did it, he said it was and accident, Hubby said one maybe but not two, he asked him why he did it Eric said I dont know. I tried to explain to him the sensory issue with tags, he stated I know all about that, so I said look far be from me to tell you what to do, but its a big differene of his being a kid and not obeying what you say, and him doing what he does do to how he is meaning Autistic. I am not making any excuses but its nothing we nor he has control of.
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KevinLivsDad wrote this reply on 06/05/2008
I had success communicating it by a known issue with a person. The person I explained it two bit there fingernails. I got crappy with that person for picking/biting there finger nails. I did it twice. Then I said, OK this is just like Liv's need to put things in her mouth.. Now, you try to stop picking your finger nails

KevinLivsDad wrote this reply on 06/05/2008
My whole comment got cut-off again. There was more to the below

carmel66 wrote this reply on 06/05/2008
I've likened it to the fact that we ALL have sensory issues - Like LIVSDAD was saying (weird things always happen to your posts, dude...). Biting nails, picking cuticals, flicking stations, twirling hair, thumb sucking, foot wiggling, gum chewing, knuckle cracking...it fulfills some sort of sensory need. It's just our kiddos have less control over impulses because they are less 'self-aware' for the most part or have MORE sensory needs than typical folks. If you need to break a sensory habit I feel the best way to do it is to make sure it's not related to a phyiscal need (pain/itch - due to lack of ability to communicate those things) and to offer replacement (if you want to suck your thumb you can do it in your room when you need to, but it's not something we do in public). But things like tags or rough clothing, that is something that can be accomodated and it's more "our fault" for forgetting rather than their fault for reacting. Hang in there -

Autism Mom wrote this reply on 06/05/2008
Gage is the same way with tags and frankly, so am I! I hate anything that itches my skin! Tell your hubby to come on here and read up some and maybe he will understand better.

MOMOFFIVE wrote this reply on 06/10/2008
You have described a scene that seems to take place at our house on a daily basis. I feel like I am the only one that remembers that Geoffrey is not like the "regular child" and that some of his responses are his reality. I am the one that does all of the research and try to get as much information as possible and try to pass it on. I have been asking teachers, doctors, friends, etc if there is something I can do to make OUR family more aware, (besides giving them the information and hope that they read it) it is VERY frustrating and it causes friction in our family. I guess what I am saying, is I completely understand your situation, yet I cannot give you one word of advice, as I can't find any help either!

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