Silas Started his special preschool this moth, and getting him on the bus is pure torture every time....the first day i got on the bus to and the bus driver reached her arm out to take him and that was that...full out war...so she gave him back to me and i tried to get him in his seat, and he thrashed so hard he flew onto the floor and tried to crawl under the seat, it took BOTH of us to get him in....then he went again on monday and it was the same scene except this time he started crying when he SAW the bus coming up the road, and if i saw Silas are you going to go to school today..he say no..LOL..any ideas will be a great help!!!!..he is 3.....
asdmom wrote this reply on Jan 09, 2008 7:37 pm
Would he be able to have something special to hold or play with on the bus? Something that he could only have while riding? Does the bus have an aide? If not, you might think about requesting one. He is 3...so do they have him in a car seat? Just thinking about him being safe and not getting out of his seat during the trip....Cheryl
- Dana wrote this reply on Jan 10, 2008 2:12 am
That could be a good idea, maybe i could get him one of his stuffed horses and it could stay on the bus....and he could hold it to and from school...:) i dont think the bus has a aide, at least not one that i have seen, and yeah there are car seats...:), i know for sure there would be no keeping him in his seat if there wernt
yayarocks wrote this reply on Jan 10, 2008 2:51 am
My son James also takes the bus to his special preschool. I was pretty nervous about the whole thing. On his bus, the teacher's assistants ride the morning bus as well. That eased my nerves a bit. The first 2-3 days, he cried when I left, but the TAs said that he was fine by the time he got to school.Something that I think helped him was that the bus driver has this plastic box full of little toys. They are cheap little toys, but each kid can pick something out for the ride. I don't know how it happened, but by the end of the first week, he LOVED the bus. Every time he would see a school bus, he would point it out and say "bus!!!"I think the fact that the bus driver (Cindy is her name... she's awesome) gave him a toy made her a safe and nice person to him. Good luck! I know it's soooo hard to see your kid cry! It's harder for us than it is for them, sometimes.
- Dana wrote this reply on Jan 10, 2008 1:50 pm
i dont think there is a aide, when she comes there is one other little boy on the bus and that is it....I know what you mean...i was not upset at the fact he was crying, i was upset becasue i was wondering what in the world is he thinking....he must be scared to death, i kept saying he would be right back, but i dont even think he heard me....i think i will send on the bus one of his horses, he is OBSESSED with horses, it is all he cares about and maybe if he can have somehting familiar he wont be as scared....
HeatherK wrote this reply on Jan 10, 2008 4:51 am
Hi Dana,
Good replies from others. My youngest (more severely affected) son needed a five point harness for safety and to keep him in the seat for the first year. He had an aide on the bus too- I would demand an aide. His bus driver kept some books that he loved on the bus all of the time (I supplied). If your son prefers toys or something to fidgit with over books, I would let him bring them on the bus.
Does he understand social stories yet? You could prepare a simple social story with pecs incorperating fun into it to help with the new transition.
You could maybe act out a funny play activity with cardboard boxes, etc.. about riding the bus.
Good Luck, I know how hard it is to go through the preschool/bus transition!
Heather
- Dana wrote this reply on Jan 10, 2008 1:53 pm
yes they have 5 point harness seats on his bus to, it is a half bus and there is one car seat per seat. i dont think his driver has ANYTHING to calm the kids...to me she seems a bit ditzy..lol...she drove past my house twice, because she said she could not find it , and i was at the end of the driveway!..LOL, now that you mention it the neurologist sadi do drill carol gray's social stories in his head so i bought a book, but have never used it, i will have to look in there for a story about a bus.
- 4muskateers wrote this reply on Jan 11, 2008 4:14 pm
Hi, sweetie.What most of us usally do is make up our own social story booklet. It is very simple take pictures of the house, you waving good bye, the bus, him getting on the bus, him getting to school, him getting back on the bus, his street, his house with mommy at the driveway. He will see you are right were he left you. After a few tries he should beable to see that you will be were he left you and it might be easier to let you go. If he needs to keep the book with him in school it should be fine, this way he can see where he left mommy. Using real pictures is best because it is like if we could see into their minds and it is reasuring to him by letting others see his fears, and his pleasures. You can even add very simple captions too. The easies way I found to hold Caspers pictures was buying a $1.00 photo album that you can slide the pictures into and have the words on the facing page. You can tape the opening shut so the pictures do not fall out. (remeber , try not to take picutres long ways they so not fit well in the albums). Let me know please if this helped 4 muskateers.
- Dana wrote this reply on Jan 11, 2008 5:45 pm
That is a good idea, he does enjoy looking at pictures of familiar faces....we will give ti a shot...:) thanks so much for the idea!
shannonj wrote this reply on Jan 10, 2008 12:37 pm
Hi Dana-My heart goes out to you. My son was 3 as well when he started his special needs preschool. He is one of those kids who is very sensitive, over-stimulated very easily and has a difficult time with transitions. I wish I had paid more attention to that aspect of him earlier on. But I was told that it was best just to push through things and he would eventually catch on....Now I know that kids like him need a totally different approach than the children who might be under-stimulated and therefore not as easily affected by changes in their environment. I wonder if you might have the opportunity to drive him. He may need more time to adjust than getting on the bus allows, he may also need you to walk him into school and get him settled. There may be noises, smells, textures on the bus that make him feel sick or uncomfortable...Or maybe there is something/someone in the building that makes him uncomfortable and refusing to get on the bus is his way of communicating to you...I firmly believe in paying attention to such signals as these kids really do have sensory systems that don't work the same as ours....Good luck figuring it out.
- Dana wrote this reply on Jan 10, 2008 1:59 pm
i think he sounds allot like your son...He went to this school, for a day of evaluation with tristen, and tristen said he would not cooperate at all, then we were to take him back for a day alone so they could see how he interacted with the kdis, well i got a call saying we had to pick him up becasue he was hysterical...so they tried again the week after....and he stayed the whole time that time but the report said he spent most of the time under the table and so the teacher had to go under the table to interact with him, but, he did come out to play with his FAVORITE things in the world....horses, well we had to go back for the meetign to sign papers and set up dates and times, and the SECOND we pulled into the parking lot he lost it and was screaming no no no no no and pointing at the building. and now we are trying to tackle the bus....i wish i could drive him i would do it in a heart beat, but we have one car and my husband has to take it to work. and now whenever we get in the truck he says no bus no bus....or if we get in a car, that is not daddys truck he flips out....
mommy2specialtony wrote this reply on Jan 11, 2008 4:47 am
Awwwww Poor kid! What we did with Anthony might work with Silas....What we did was make a little book with the school bus and went to the school before hand and made a little story about him going to school with real pictures and got it lamonated. This really helped alot! We also did the same thing for the denist and every thing major that he has coming up. Then we just keep the book so we can use them over again every single time. Hope that helps....
- Dana wrote this reply on Jan 11, 2008 5:46 pm
i am going to try to make him a little book, that is a good idea, at this point i am willing to try it all, thanks so much :) ;) ;)
- mommy2specialtony wrote this reply on Jan 21, 2008 7:10 pm
It really does work, we actually have fun making them together to LOL
4thekidz wrote this reply on Jan 11, 2008 2:51 pm
Dana, my heart goes out to you and Silas. Are you working or stay at home mom? If you are home I would pull him out of preschool. I know that this is a social thing that we all want our little guys to attend however, it sounds like he is the type (like my Evan) to never forget a bad thing, setting or person that rubs him the wrong way. I have had progress in the past to bring Evan to playgroups in the neighborhood, post something at the grocery store. I also found a preschool that allowed me to attend with him in return I volunteered my time in the class room and he began to separate from me and rely on the other teachers for things. Please remember that the bus and preschool are not the only option and that our sensy kids are soooo different from the others and need so much modification on setting and situations.
- Dana wrote this reply on Jan 11, 2008 5:49 pm
i am a stay at home mama.....o yes he never forgets..:)...i thought about not sending him but then he would only be getting speech once a week, and no OT at all...the Neurologist said he needs aggressive speech therapy...so i am torn beyond belief...I REALLY wish i could drive him...i think he would feel so much more comfortable if i was the one taking him, cause i could get him settled in his room.
- challeve wrote this reply on Jan 18, 2008 4:05 pm
Dana,I understand completely how you feel. In addition to the book, talk to him every day about going on the bus and make it sound like a fun, happy trip. Tell him the interesting things he'll see and the nice people who are there to help him in school once he gets off the bus. Also, let him know that you're not leaving him or sending him away, but that you're "lending" him to the other kids so they can have a good time together for a little while, and that he'll always come back home.It'll take a while, but it won't be so traumatic for him once he knows what's behind the bus trip.Hang on in there!
challeve wrote this reply on Jan 18, 2008 4:08 pm
Dana,I understand completely how you feel. In addition to the book, talk to him every day about going on the bus and make it sound like a fun, happy trip. Tell him the interesting things he'll see and the nice people who are there to help him in school once he gets off the bus. Also, let him know that you're not leaving him or sending him away, but that you're "lending" him to the other kids so they can have a good time together for a little while, and that he'll always come back home.It'll take a while, but it won't be so traumatic for him once he knows what's behind the bus trip.Hang on in there!
Mrs.H. wrote this reply on Feb 08, 2008 10:10 pm
I agree with the social stories idea. It is also helpful to have the same social story at all three places : home, bus, school. That way they can be reinforced, all using the same language, and he gets the repitition to maybe start developing a different behavior.A "lovey" is great. If he has a favorite show - Thomas, or Curious George, you could purchase a new one if needed, make a big deal of how it is his Bus Buddy, and rides to and fro with him carrying maybe the scent of your perfume, or something that reminds him of you.Sometimes a vinyl window "sticker" - Winnie the Pooh or Dora maybe, will give him a comfortable focal point.Another thought is music - does he have any favorites. Would wearing a. iPod with his favorite, soothing bus tunes help him out.I try to figure out what it is about the bus that's distressing. Is it the driver, the vast open space, the separation from home, the vibrations of the bus, the noise of the bus, the unfamiliar car seat? Sometimes, when you can flush out what the disturbing factor is, and address it,you can change the learned pattern pretty quickly. Hope this helps - good luck! :)r.
Autismdad wrote this reply on Apr 29, 2009 5:40 am
Does he like music A small MP3 player and over the ear ear phones may help, also hit some of the "used game stores and see if they have a used gamboy micro, and pick up some vid games or even gameboy videos to pass the timeon the bus. It worked with our boy since starting pere k special ed. He currently has a 30 to 40 minute commute to his 2 --3 rd grade BOCES program.
