You are invited to the GALLERY of ODDS & ENDS GRAND OPENING EVENT Sunday, Dec. 9, 2007 10 am - 5 pm 37424 N. Cave Creek Rd. Cave Creek, Az 85331 Featuring our local Cowgirls Forever Dutch Oven Cooking Artists and Craftsmen Non-profit Organizations "Hay for the Holidays" Raffle "Andrea's Closet" Toy Drive ASAP Handyman Service Contact Jim Hawker 480-703-9312 or Michelle Muller 602-577-2727 for information and reservations for artists, craftsmen and non-profit organizations The Gallery of Odds & Ends is accepting donations Tuesdays through Sundays, high noon to sunset. Come on by and take a peek before the Grand Opening. Michelle Muller The Gallery of Odds & Ends A Fund Raiser for ALL Non-Profits including the Autism Spectrum Alternative Program www.asapranch.org 602-577-ASAP

You are invited to the GALLERY of ODDS & ENDS GRAND OPENING EVENT Sunday, Dec. 9, 2007 10 am - 5 pm 37424 N. Cave Creek Rd. Cave Creek, Az 85331 Featuring our local Cowgirls Forever Dutch Oven Cooking Artists and Craftsmen Non-profit Organizations "Hay for the Holidays" Raffle "Andrea's Closet" Toy Drive ASAP Handyman Service Contact Jim Hawker 480-703-9312 or Michelle Muller 602-577-2727 for information and reservations for artists, craftsmen and non-profit organizations The Gallery of Odds & Ends is accepting donations Tuesdays through Sundays, high noon to sunset. Come on by and take a peek before the Grand Opening. Michelle Muller The Gallery of Odds & Ends A Fund Raiser for ALL Non-Profits including the Autism Spectrum Alternative Program www.asapranch.org 602-577-ASAP

What a day we had last Thursday... I found myself with tears in my eyes one minute, and amazed and touched the next by how my Andrew thinks and how he is learning to cope during this challenging time in his life. Those of you who have read my Disgusted and Disheartened essay know that my wonderful son Andrew "graduated" from school on his 22 birthday (per Mass law), 4 weeks ago. This has been a difficult time for both of us but it has been especially hard for him. Imagine having teachers who are so kind, and respectful of you, who treat you so well and who truly love to be around you… Imagine having great fun with them, knowing they are your friends… Imagine them teaching you so many things… Imagine doing this for nearly 10 years… Then imagine one day you are told that it is ALL DONE FOREVER! Imagine the following Monday you go to a new place, with all strangers, where your regular daily schedule of fun and interesting activities is suddenly gone…This is what Andrew has faced in the last month and it has been so hard for him. Andy’s teachers, our Autism Consultant and I all did our best by having him visit the “adult program” before he left school and by preparing him for his “graduation” using social stories. So far Andy has done better than I expected. He hasn’t had any severe meltdowns, but he is sad and he desperately misses his favorite teachers who he considered his “friends.” Over the last month he gets in moods where he sits at the kitchen table or on his therapy ball and says “I want to go see Jim and Kevin’s school”, in a very plaintive tone of voice. If he says it once he says it a hundred times. I show him and tell him over and over that “you had your graduation honey, school is all done.” And I know he knows school is all done, but I also know that he is wishing and praying that it wasn’t so. I knew a couple of years before he graduated that loosing these teachers who he absolutely adored was going to be hard on him. To help him adjust I planned to take him for a 40 minute visits during the last period of the school day, every two weeks during November. Then I would taper our visits back to once a month. I am hoping these visits will ease the loss for him. Two weeks ago was our first visit and I was so excited. I picked Andy up early from the adult program and drove him the 25 miles back to his school. Andy was quiet on the ride, and as we got closer to school he shocked me by suddenly yelling, “No school!!” “No Kevin!!” (Kevin was his favorite teacher who played “Glove tennis ball” with him in the gym every single day after PE class.) I was so surprised that I wasn’t sure what to say. I couldn’t figure out why he wouldn’t want to see everyone. I thought for a moment and figured, I’ve driven all this way, and he’ll be glad once he gets in there, so I’ll twist his arm a bit to get him to go in. Andy had been asking for a “bagel creamy cheese” earlier so I told him, we will go get a bagel creamy cheese AFTER you go see your friends. Andy was none too happy; in fact I could tell he was quite tense because he was stimming like crazy. When we got to the school and I reminded Andy that we will get the bagel after he goes in to visit his friends. Andy is tense but gets out of the car and we walk to the building. Once inside we immediately run into Earle his PE teacher. Earle is thrilled! “ANDREW!!” he said as he reaches out to pat him on the back. Andy cringed, he was totally overwhelmed and then he pushed Earle, “MOVE AWAY PLEASE” Andy said. Earle was as surprised as I was earlier and I tried to make an excuse as to why Andy is so upset. We tried to visit a couple of other teachers. Everyone was so excited to see him and they tried to ask me all kinds of questions about how he is doing, but I am busy trying to keep him calm. Finally Andy has had enough and he runs out of the building and into the peace and quiet of the car. I let him go because I know he needs some time to calm down. I stayed behind to talk to Barbara one of Andy’s other very favorite teachers, and someone who I also feel very close too. She was deeply concerned about Andy’s reaction and I fill her in on his first two weeks at the Adult program. As I talked to her I was reminded of how much I miss all of them too. I drove Andy to school every day for 5 years and I popped in two or three mornings a week just to chat with whomever was around. If I miss them so much, I can’t even imagine how Andrew must feel. Just like on his “graduation day” my heart was breaking for him. Over the next weeks I will think a lot about whether it is a good idea or not to bring Andy back in two weeks for another visit. I am seriously considering not taking him and waiting a full month. But since that first disastrous visit Andy would say many times daily, “You want to go see Jim and Kevin’s school!!” I knew he meant he wanted to quit this whole stupid adult program and to go back to school. It was hard to keep saying over and over to him, “you had your graduation sweetie, school is all done, but we can go and visit your friends for a little while.” Finally visiting day comes. Jim’s photo on Andy’s calendar tells him this is the day we can visit. When Andy stated that morning “You want to go see Jim and Kevin’s school!!” I knew we had to try again. And, although some people had been questioning me, asking if it was a good idea to take him to visit again I KNEW Andy needed a second chance. Going back was the only way he would start to “get it.” To understand that he can’t go back to school, but he can go and visit his friends. At 1:00 I pick Andy up from the adult program. He is in a WONDERFUL mood all smiles and so glad to see me. We hop in the car and head off. After a few minutes of driving and listening to Andy’s favorite Elvis Costello tape I say to him, “Remember where we are going today? We are going to visit your friends, Kevin and Jim and Barbara and Earle.” Andy looks at me without much of an expression, but he is calm… I’ll take calm. We ride the rest of the way to school with me saying occasionally, “it will be good to visit your friends” and “they will be so happy to see you.” I wonder what he is thinking. We arrive at the school and park across the street. A couple of busses are there already even though dismissal isn’t for another 40 minutes. I look at Andy, “are you ready to see your friends” I ask. He doesn’t say anything but grabs his coat and backpack. “No” I tell him, “you can leave those in the car.” Andy looks at me and urgently says “bring your coat and backpack.” Ah ha, I think, I know what he is up to… he is going to do this just as if it were any other day and he was going to school. “Ok” I say and we head off towards the building. On the way in I ask him, “Who do you want to see first, Jim or Barbara?” “Barbara” he tells me, but the second we get in the door he heads right up the hall to Jim’s room just like he did every morning for so many years. As usual Andy is walking twice as fast as me, and I can see him heading for the coat hooks outside Jim’s room. I know Andy’s hook has now been taken over by another student, but Andy wouldn’t even be able to imagine that his hook will not be there waiting for him. His hook had been the second one over from the door and he is making a bee line for it. I see him move some other student’s coat and backpack from “his hook.” When I get there I convince him to put his coat on an empty hook, but suddenly he is getting upset. In a very urgent tone of voice he is saying over and over and over, “Kevin take you to the Y Pool!!!!” Andy went to the Y swimming on Thursday mornings for almost 10 years and today is Thursday. “Let’s go see Kevin”, I say. We walk across the hall to Kevin’s classroom. Andy whose is already upset and overwhelmed covers his head with his arms as we walk in the door. Two of the boys who were in his home room jump from their seats when they see him. They whoop and cheer “LOOK, IT’S ANDREW HE IS BACK!!” And they crowd around Andy while all 6’ 2” of him clings to me with his arms covering his head. He is getting louder by the second. He yells “KEVIN TAKE YOU TO THE Y POOL !!!!!” I put my face close to his as I try to calm him down and as I choke back tears at this very sweet and unexpected greeting from the boys. Kevin comes over to direct the boys back to their seats and to say hello, but Andy is stuck. He cannot stop asking for Kevin and the Y Pool. Although Andy misses his teachers he also misses the wonderful and busy routine of school and most of all swimming at the Y. It was the highlight of his week. Andy is so upset that he can’t greet Kevin or answer a simple “how are you doing?” I try to distract Andy but he is too upset. I can’t even answer Kevin’s questions about how he is doing in the new program. I decide it is time to see Jim! I tell Andy “Let’s go see Jim.” and for some reason, which I’ll discover in a minute, he suddenly lets the Y pool go and we go back across the hall to Jim’s room. Jim’s door is closed and Andy stands there a moment just looking inside. I wonder what he is thinking and wish that he could tell me. I tell him, “Go ahead Andy, go see Jim” and at that moment Jim turns around, smiles and strides toward the door as Andy opens it. “Andy! It’s so good to see you! How are you?” Jim says as he reaches out his hand. Andy reaches out too, shakes Jim’s hand and says “hi Jim.” Then he is off. I am standing there holding his daily notebook, which he had insisted on taking out of his backpack. He turns to me and says “put the notebook on the desk!” before going to get his paper shredder, a small stack of paper, and the extension cord. This was Andy’s morning routine. He would shred papers for 15 minutes or so in the morning before he headed out to work, or to go to the Y for swim. Jim laughs as he watches him set up and says “well Andy, why don’t you just make your self at home.” It was at that moment that I knew that this was EXACTLY what Andy needed. He wanted to see his friends but he also desperately wanted his home room back, his routine back. Jim and I sit down and we chat while Andy shreds. We talk about the new program and how Andy is handling all of the changes. We also discuss the Patriots, and the Celtics because that we would always talked sports when I dropped Andy off for school. Andy shreds for about 10 or 15 minutes and then I tell him it’s time to go see Earle and Barbara. He sweetly says good bye to Jim and we head back down the hall towards the office. As we walk I look up at my sweet son to see that he is beaming from ear to ear. “Do you want to go see Barbara?” I ask. “Yes”, he says. I ask him, “are you going to give her a hug?” he smiles and says “yes.” We go into the office and there is Barbara. She sees him and smiles. Andy walks over to her and Barbara throws her arms around him and gives him a huge hug. Andy is beaming. “How’s my big guy? How’s my big Ange?” she asks, but he doesn’t move or say a word, he is basking in her hug. After a moment she asks me how things are going. I can’t say too much in front of him because I am so unhappy with the program. I make the so so motion with my hand and tell her I’ll e-mail her. Before we leave Andy has one last thing he has to do. He says “I want the soda machine please.” And I tell him go ahead. For the last two or three years Andy got a soda out of the machine in the teacher’s room at lunch time every day. One more part of his routine that is really misses. As we are getting ready to leave we run into Earle. Andy gets another enthusiastic greeting and I take a moment to chat with him too. He wants to know how Andy is doing. He tells me how much he misses him. Andy is ready to go and we say our good-byes. As Andy and I slowly make our way to the car I look at his face and he looks so happy, so at ease. I too have a huge smile on my face. “Wasn’t that great I ask? Wasn’t it fun to visit your friends at school?” Andy doesn’t say anything, he just continues to smile. I think how wonderful it is that he is happy. I am thrilled he was able to do this today without running out of the building. I am proud that he is so smart that knew what he needed to feel better. For Andy it was more than just seeing his friends. He needed to bring his backpack in, to shred the papers, to get his soda. When we get home he looks at me and says “Go see Jim and Kevin’s school?” this time it is without that sense of urgency in his voice. I tell him “Yes Andy we can go back to visit Kevin and Jim” and I am thinking I can’t wait to go back and visit again too.

I received this back in 1995; it still holds true today! I hope you all enjoy it. ~~ Michelle ~~ Welcome to Holland I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability – to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this… When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip – to Italy. You buy a bunch of guidebooks and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum, the Michelangelo David, the gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting. After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland." "Holland?!" you say. "What do you mean, Holland?" I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy. But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay. The important thing is that they haven't taken you to some horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place. So you must go out and buy a new guidebook. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met. It's just a different place. It's slower paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around, and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills, Holland has tulips, Holland even has Rembrandts. But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy, and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life you will say, "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned." The pain of that will never, ever, go away, because the loss of that dream is a very significant loss. But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things about Holland. Written by Emily Perl Kingsley

Our grand opening is this weekend. I invite you to come visit, shop and bring items for sale to benefit YOUR organization! ODDS & ENDS "RAISING MONEY FOR NON PROFIT ORGANIZATIONS" Accepting donations for non profit organizations of antiques, artwork, collectables, one-of-a-kind items, old, gently used and new tools, all kinds of jewelry, vintage clothing, items with organizational logos, western memorabilia, and other odds and ends. All items are donated to the store and sold. Proceeds benefit your favorite non-profit organization! This is a great way to easily part with treasured odds and ends and "Pay it forward." With your donations, support, and networking all of our non-profit organizations will win! LOCATED AT CAVE CREEK WELDING NEXT TO FIRE DEPARTMENT VOLUNTEERS are always welcome particularly with technical support,marketing, and contacting organizations to contribute items and much more. Call Michelle 602-577-2727 or Jim 480-703-9312 All donations are tax deductible The AUTISM SPECTRUM ALTERNATIVE PROGRAM The Autism Spectrum Alternative Program (ASAP) is an effective, equine facilitated trail-riding program designed to help people with physical, mental, emotional or behavior challenges. ASAP is proven to be one the quickest, most effective ways to guide people from where they are today and experience the potentiality of where they could be tomorrow. Our mission is to help families and the communities respond to and meet the social and emotional needs of individuals with physical, mental, emotional or behavior challenges in a positive and sensitive manner through nature and a relationship with an equine partner. Our primary goal is to raise funds through trail rides sponsored by businesses, foundations and community clubs so more individuals can experience the healing power of our equine friends. www.asapranch.org 602-577-ASAP (2727) All Donations are Tax Deductible Michelle Muller Autism Spectrum Alternative Program Executive Director PO Box 4804 Cave Creek, Az 85331 www.asapranch.org 602-577-ASAP

Boy I know no one warns you what it is like to have a child with Autism but even after all these years of living with Autism and 13 years of working in the autism field I had NO IDEA how bad things would be when Andrew left school. Adult services are a joke. Their knowledge of Autism is where the public schools knowledge was back in 1993. Stop and think about how good or bad public school is right now for your child and no imagine how serious the lack of knowledge was in public schools 14 years ago! Now fast forward to today because that is where the knowledge is in adult services. Sure there are probably some great programs that are few and far between but I visited many trying to decide where Andy would go. I saw VERY FEW adults with Autism. (Ratios ran around 64 adults with MR and 6 adults with autism, or in the case of where Andy goes 24 adults with MR and with Andy 3 adults with Autism.) Most of the people in programs have varying degrees of mental retardation and it seemed many were between mid 20s and mid 40s. In the day programs I saw them doing puzzles (this is a daily activity at Andys program) watching TV (another daily activity at Andys program), sitting on the floor rolling a ball back and forth to one another, and I actually saw group of 30 and 40 year olds doing the hokey pokey for exercise (I almost had a stroke when I saw that!) or walking on treadmills. The MINIMAL work opportunities are almost exclusively recycling cans or cleaning jobs. Andys first two weeks in his adult program there was so little for him to do that he was spending 3 to 4 hours a day shredding papers because that was the only thing there that was familiar to him. This is a kid who likes to shred but NEVER More than a half hour because after that he is DONE! Because he is so bored and isn't getting enough physical activity he is OFF THE WALL when he gets home and is having trouble sleeping at night. He is now interning at a discount store 2 hours a week during the program but still the rest of the time is boredom to the nth degree. What might be even worse is that Andy is SO SAD (translation irritable and obsessing) He desperatly misses his school, their routines and all of the fun and interesting things he had to do every day. (and I used to complain there was too much down time there! HAHA!! They were non stop action compared to what he is doing now.) He constantly asks over and over and over to go to school or to see his teachers. But when I took him to visit last week he became so distraught he ran out of the school and didn't want to see anyone. I think it hurt him so much to know he couldn't go back to regular school. It is just horrible to see your child in so much pain and to know what a wonderful school they were in and now they are DUMPED into "adult services" And the WHY, of why things are so terrible is by and large these programs are funded by a combination of Medicaid and the state department that deals with people with mental retardation. In Massachusetts that is DMR and they are loosing funding every year for adults, so there is no money to have interesting and meaningful things for these wonderful people to do. For higher functioning kids, those in between kids, (the ones whose IQ is above 70 so they dont qualify for mental retardation but who arent so high functioning that theyll be going off to college) they are really screwed because they cant get much of anything. The only good thing is that they are generally high functioning enough to hold at least a part time job if they can get help from their state department of rehabilitation assistance for a job coach. They also will need lots of help from their families. I never thought that just months before my 50th birthday that I would be starting all over again from scratch, trying to get people to understand WHAT AUTISM IS, the needs of people with Autism, for them to grasp what best practices for Autism REALLY MEANS, and to face the double edge sword of no federal MANDATES like when your child is in public school (laws that say what your child must have for education) and no funding either. Is it any wonder I am disgusted and disheartened and exhausted?