Welcome to FoggyRock

Caliboo818 - A Little by Little Production

City: Duarte
State: CA
Country: USA
Member since: Mar 09, 2008
Last logged in: Nov 07, 2008

Send Message

Personal Tags

Parent, Mother, Auditory Integration Therapy, Speech Therapy, Physical Therapy

View all tags

Caliboo818's Page URL

http://www.foggyrock.com/MyPage/Caliboo818

Caliboo818's Bio

Greeting to you all. I know you are saying about time she tells us something about her self lmbo. Well I am a MSAHM of four wonderful kids.

Three girls Lonette 21 soon to graduate next month from Grambling State. Erica 20 Sophomore from Grambling State. Brianna 14 8th grade and my son Eric 13 he was diagnosed with Asthma at 8 month, Autism/PDD at 2, Absence Seizures at 10 and now ADD/ADHD. I have been married for 20 years to my wonderful husband Eric as time goes by you will learn more about us.

Eric was born August 18, 1995 the youngest of 4 children he has three othere sister’s Lonette 21, Erica 19 and Brianna 13. The delivery with Eric was normal except the several cases of false labor he weighed 6 pounds 7 ounces and made his television debuet that same day along with his sister Brianna Hubby and I

. While growing up he had multiple ear infections and was diagnosed with Asthma at the age of 9 months we almost lost him at that point.

We began to notice something was wrong when he spoke his first sentence at the age of one which was "Hey chuckle head" and from then on nothing more was said except for mommy and daddy, so in speaking to other people they just said that is normal for boys mature slower then girls and not to worry so we didnt.

On a normal visit to his see his physician Dr Myrah Kahn she began to notice things in Eric like his speech not talking in full sentences, or when he wanted something he would grab you by the finger and lead you to it and point or just grunt.

So she suggested we or when you would ask him a question he would just repeat it so we suggested we take him to have his hearing checked so off to Olive View Medical we went, the hearing test came out fine.

Where they gave a series of other test and thats when we were given the news that Eric had Autism and it felt like my world came crumbling down.

I mean all I felt was anger, frustration, sadness for about two weeks I was on a fog, but then I had to get it together so I could get

Eric the help he needed for we started to see how this was effecting him how he would become frustrated when you could not understand him so he would become angry and fight, his attention span was very short and he would cry for no reason.

But as time when by and he got the proper care from schools like Horaceman, Providencia and Miller and all the wonderful teachers and assistants that worked with him.

. Also the wonderful people from the Frank D Lanterman Center especially Darlene who came into our home and helped us with Eric with the toilet training it was a long process but we all got it done.

Angela how has come in and helped with behavioral issues when needed. In 2006 he was diagnosed with Absence seizures and now in 2008 they think he may have adhd we are having him tested in a few week for that.

It has been a never ending journey with Eric sometimes regression will set in or he will have meltdowns so bad that I just want to sit down and cry with him.

School has had its up and downs his last school he did so well he gave the graduation speech that you can find on my page here.

This year has not been that kind a few of the kids have not been that acceptable of Eric, he has had his arm broken, picked on things thrown at him all because he is different, and friendly kid and according to the school dont fit into the "normal range of a child with Autism" what ever that means. But he is not letting the fact that he is "Different change him" he is loved by so many people due to his charming personaliy thats why we call him our Prince lol.

Just last week he was asked by the Spanish teacher if she could have him in her 7th period class here he normally takes Piano, the reason there is a child in there that will not speak but will communicate with Eric in Spanish, and its funny for when Eric speaks in English he tends to stutter, but when speaking in Spanish it flows out smooth and he has no accent.

So Eric on his on accord agreeded to change his class so he can help his friend to learn to speak in English.

So yes Autism has his bad themes but at times Autism can bring out qualities in our kids we never knew they had.

Have a blessed day

Favorite Wit & Wisdom (4)

when you

when think you think you got it bad,,,,, there is someome that has always got it worse than you do... Read more

By maniacmanormom on 01.01.70- public

Because sometimes its good to say it out loud!

A good friend of mine in our group posted this message and asked all of the parents to leave their t... Read more

By Caliboo818 on 01.01.70- public

View All..

Caliboo818's Wit & Wisdom (13)

Ten ways we misunderstand children
by Caliboo818 on 07.31.08 - public

1. We expect children to be able to do things before they are ready.

We ask an infant to keep quiet. We ask a 2-year-old to sit still. We ask a 4-y...

Me Too! 0 High Five 3 Hilarious! 0 I'm Moved 0 Impressive 4

Title :

Description :

1. We expect children to be able to do things before they are ready.

We ask an infant to keep quiet. We ask a 2-year-old to sit still. We ask a 4-year-old to clean his room. In all of these situations, we are being unrealistic. We are setting ourselves up for disappointment and setting up the child for repeated failures to please us. Yet many parents ask their young children to do things that even an older child would find difficult. In short, we ask children to stop acting their age.

2. We become angry when a child fails to meet our needs.

A child can only do what he can do. If a child cannot do something we ask, it is unfair and unrealistic to expect or demand more, and anger only makes things worse. A 2-year-old can only act like a 2-year-old, a 5-year-old cannot act like a 10-year-old, and a 10-year-old cannot act like an adult. To expect more is unrealistic and unhelpful. There are limits to what a child can manage, and if we don't accept those limits, it can only result in frustration on both sides.

3. We mistrust the child's motives.

If a child cannot meet our needs, we assume that he is being defiant, instead of looking closely at the situation from the child's point of view, so we can determine the truth of the matter. In reality, a "defiant" child may be ill, tired, hungry, in pain, responding to an emotional or physical hurt, or struggling with a hidden cause such as food allergy. Yet we seem to overlook these possibilities in favor of thinking the worst about the child's "personality".

4. We don't allow children to be children.

We somehow forget what it was like to be a child ourselves, and expect the child to act like an adult instead of acting his age. A healthy child will be rambunctious, noisy, emotionally expressive, and will have a short attention span. All of these "problems" are not problems at all, but are in fact normal qualities of a normal child. Rather, it is our society and our society's expectations of perfect behavior that are abnormal.

5. We get it backwards.

We expect, and demand, that the child meet our needs - for quiet, for uninterrupted sleep, for obedience to our wishes, and so on. Instead of accepting our parental role to meet the child's needs, we expect the child to care for ours. We can become so focussed on our own unmet needs and frustrations that we forget this is a child, who has needs of his own.

6. We blame and criticize when a child makes a mistake.

Yet children have had very little experience in life, and they will inevitably make mistakes. Mistakes are a natural part of learning at any age. Instead of understanding and helping the child, we blame him, as though he should be able to learn everything perfectly the first time. To err is human; to err in childhood is human and unavoidable. Yet we react to each mistake, infraction of a rule, or misbehavior with surprise and disappointment. It makes no sense to understand that a child will make mistakes, and then to react as though we think the child should behave perfectly at all times.

7. We forget how deeply blame and criticism can hurt a child.

Many parents are coming to understand that physically hurting a child is wrong and harmful, yet many of us forget how painful angry words, insults, and blame can be to a child who can only believe that he is at fault.

8. We forget how healing loving actions can be.

We fall into vicious cycles of blame and misbehavior, instead of stopping to give the child love, reassurance, self-esteem, and security with hugs and kind words.

9. We forget that our behavior provides the most potent lessons to the child.

It is truly "not what we say but what we do" that the child takes to heart. A parent who hits a child for hitting, telling him that hitting is wrong, is in fact teaching that hitting is right, at least for those in power. It is the parent who responds to problems with peaceful solutions who is teaching his child how to be a peaceful adult. So-called problems present our best opportunity for teaching values, because children learn best when they are learning about real things in real life.

10. We see only the outward behavior, not the love and good intentions inside the child.

When a child's behavior disappoints us, we should, more than anything else we do, "assume the best". We should assume that the child means well and is only behaving as well as possible considering all the circumstances (both obvious and hidden from us), together with his level of experience in life. If we always assume the best about our child, the child will be free to do his best. If we give only love, love is all we will receive.

Type

Public Private

Top 10 Facts About Autism
by Caliboo818 on 07.12.08 - public

Parents of children with autism quickly become authorities on the subject. But what about in-laws, teachers, coaches, and cousins? Few people outside ...

Me Too! 0 High Five 3 Hilarious! 0 I'm Moved 0 Impressive 2

Title :

Description :

Parents of children with autism quickly become authorities on the subject. But what about in-laws, teachers, coaches, and cousins? Few people outside the immediate family really want to read 20 closely-written pages from the National Institutes of Health. This brief, pithy article provides the bare bones basics for a quick read - along with links to more in-depth information for those who want to know.

1. Autism Is a 'Spectrum' Disorder
People with autism can be a little autistic or very autistic. Thus, it is possible to be bright, verbal, and autistic as well as mentally retarded, non-verbal and autistic. A disorder that includes such a broad range of symptoms is often called a spectrum disorder; hence the term "autism spectrum disorder." The most significant shared symptom is difficulty with social communication (eye contact, conversation, taking another's perspective, etc.).

2. Asperger Syndrome is a High Functioning Form of Autism
Asperger Syndrome (AS) is considered to be a part of the autism spectrum. The only significant difference between AS and High Functioning Autism is that people with AS usually develop speech right on time while people with autism usually have speech delays. People with AS are generally very bright and verbal, but have significant social deficits (which is why AS has earned the nickname "Geek Syndrome"). 3. People With Autism Are Different from One Another
If you've seen Rainman or a TV show about autism, you may think you know what autism "looks like." In fact, though, when you've met one person with with autism you've met ONE person with autism. Some people with autism are chatty; others are silent. Many have sensory issues, gastrointestinal problems, sleep difficulties and other medical problems. Others may have social-communication delays - and that's it.4. There Are Dozens of Treatments for Autism - But No 'Cure'
So far as medical science is aware, there is at present no cure for autism. That's not to say that people with autism don't improve, because many improve radically. But even when people with autism increase their skills, they are still autistic, which means they think and perceive differently from most people. Children with autism may receive many types of treatments. Treatments may be biomedical, sensory, behavioral, developmental or even arts-based. Depending upon the child, certain treatments will be more successful than others.5. There Are Many Theories on the Cause of Autism, But No Consensus
You may have seen or heard news stories about possible causes of autism. Theories range from mercury in infant vaccines to genetics to the age of the parents to almost everything else. At present, most researchers think autism is caused by a combination of genetic and environmental factors - and it's quite possible that different people's symptoms have different causes.6. People Don't Grow Out of Autism 
Autism is a lifelong diagnosis. For some people, often (but not always) those who receive intensive early intervention, symptoms may decrease radically. People with autism can also learn coping skills to help them manage their difficulties and even build on their unique strengths. But a person with autism will probably be autistic throughout their lives.7. Families Coping with Autism Need Help and Support
Even "high functioning" autism is challenging for parents. "Low functioning" autism can be overwhelming to the entire family. Families may be under a great deal of stress, and they need all the non-judgemental help they can get from friends, extended family, and service providers. Respite care (someone else taking care of the person with autism while other family members take a break) can be a marriage and/or family-saver!8. There's No 'Best School' for a Child with Autism
You may have heard of a wonderful "autism school," or read of a child doing amazingly well in a particular type of classroom setting. While any given setting may be perfect for any given child, every child with autism has unique needs. Even in an ideal world, "including" a child with autism in a typical class may not be the best choice. Decisions about autistic education are generally made by a team made up of parents, teachers, administrators and therapists who know the child well.9. There Are Many Unfounded Myths About Autism
The media is full of stories about autism, and many of those stories are less than accurate. For example, you may have heard that people with autism are cold and unfeeling, or that people with autism never marry or hold productive jobs. Since every person with autism is different, however, such "always" and "never" statements simply don't hold water. To understand a person with autism, it's a good idea to spend some time getting to know him or her - personally!10. Autistic People Have Many Strengths and Abilities
It may seem that autism is a wholly negative diagnosis. But almost everyone on the autism spectrum has a great to deal to offer the world. People with autism are among the most forthright, non-judgemental, passionate people you'll ever meet. They are also ideal candidates for many types of careers.

Type

Public Private

Autism not a punishment by God
by Caliboo818 on 07.10.08 - public

When family members start to make comments like well maybe its a punishment for something you did when you were growing up. Or maybe you are being pun...

Me Too! 2 High Five 1 Hilarious! 0 I'm Moved 2 Impressive 0

Title :

Description :

When family members start to make comments like well maybe its a punishment for something you did when you were growing up. Or maybe you are being punished for the relationship you had with your oldest child who by the way puts other people before her family it makes you want to just throw you hands up scream and say No it's not a punishment for anything to do with any of the above mention, it's something I beleive that comes into our lives to test our patience, faith, trust in God. To give us a chance to make new friends in our life that give us positive energy, not feel sorry for what we are going through but can fully understand it. God is telling us to lean on him more, beleive that all of our hard work to make changes in the School systems, Insurace Company's, Vaccines ect will pave the way for more parents with kids like ours.

So do I beleive I am being punished heck no, I beleive that Eric was giving me to me with the diagnose of Autism/PDD/Asthma/ Asthma to make me humble, apperciate life more, to seek our information I would other wise not even thought about and most of all to love more everything about all of my children including all the tiny little quirks they may have.

Type

Public Private

Sibling Bonds
by Caliboo818 on 06.10.08 - public

Sibling Bonds

I wanted to explore the bonding experiences of siblings, so I thought I would start by asking a simple question – What is it that re...

Me Too! 0 High Five 0 Hilarious! 0 I'm Moved 4 Impressive 1

Title :

Description :

Sibling Bonds

I wanted to explore the bonding experiences of siblings, so I thought I would start by asking a simple question – What is it that really keep siblings connected?

I received, from a variety of siblings, the customary and expected answers such as love, family loyalty, friendship, respect and shared memories. However, I also received at least one unexpected answer and was a little taken aback by it.

The answer? “Mutual hate of our mother.”

This response came from Andrew, a forty-four year old father of three, who has five siblings on his mother’s side. Raised as an only child by his father (the siblings do not all share the same father), he now communicates with his brothers and sisters regularly.

Each sibling was abandoned by their mother, who sometimes lived as little as two blocks away, and were raised by either their father or grandmother. Not only did they live in different households, but many were raised in different cities. They have no shared childhood memories, no family photos, but they do share a strong resentment for their mother. This one common bond has allowed them to actually build long distance relationships as friends and family.

Even though the siblings missed out on knowing each other as they grew up, they each had a good life, were raised well and had people and family who loved them. Andrew has great childhood memories and is truly very comfortable and happy with the man he has become. However Andrew admits, the one dark part of his life lies with the anger he has for his mother.

In trying to explain his bitterness, he recalls a time he reached out to his biological mother after the birth of his first daughter. His mother had moved back into town and lived only a few blocks away from his father. So one day after visiting his father, he took his new baby daughter to meet her maternal grandmother. He recalled his mother coming out to the car, being very complementary as she peeked in the window to see the baby. The visit was quick as Andrew was very angry by her reaction. His new daughter didn’t receive any of the overwhelming accolades that one might expect from a grandmother. There was no passion to hold her or any outpouring of love like he had witnessed from his wife’s mother. She didn’t even invite them into the house. She was polite and flattering, but distant, much like a stranger.

What Andrew didn’t realize was that she was a stranger, and that she didn’t feel a connection to the baby because she didn’t feel a connection to her own son. What Mary, his mother, didn’t realize was that through her actions, her son felt as if she was abandoning him all over again. What neither one may have realized was that they had just missed an opportunity to connect. Today they have no relationship at all and Andrew still admits he has not been able to reconcile his strong negative feelings for his mother. He’s had a lifetime of her walking away from him.

For parents, who by their own admission have not been the best caregiver or role model, I think there is a lesson in Andrew’s experience. I came to that conclusion based on his answer to my next question.

The lesson? For parents who are willing to reach out and to really work on their relationship with their children, there is hope. When they are willing to make real changes and not offer “the same song, just a different verse” there are possibilities. If they are willing to ask for forgiveness without excuses, there is redemption. That’s the lesson.

The question which produced the answer which should inspire us all? 
“If you mother showed up on your doorstep today and asked for forgiveness and to start a relationship, what would you do?”
“I’d forgive her,” he said without hesitation. “She’s my mother.”

Type

Public Private

How to Help a Child with Learning Disabilities Who is Lonely
by Caliboo818 on 06.04.08 - public

Children with learning disabilities (LD) are more likely to be lonely than kids without LD. A growing body of research shows that many children with L...

Me Too! 0 High Five 1 Hilarious! 0 I'm Moved 0 Impressive 0

Title :

Description :

Children with learning disabilities (LD) are more likely to be lonely than kids without LD. A growing body of research shows that many children with LD face considerable challenges in making and keeping friends. Fortunately for parents of children with LD, research studies also offer some guidance about effective approaches to help children cope with or avoid loneliness.

In this article, the second of two on the topic of loneliness among children with LD, we present the research findings of Dr. Malka Margalit, Head of the Constantiner School of Education at Tel-Aviv University in Israel, who has studied loneliness among children with LD for more than 20 years.

The first article, "Loneliness among Children with Learning Disabilities,” addressed the questions:

Why are children with LD more likely than their peers to be lonely? 
How do children with LD experience loneliness? 
What are some particular social and emotional characteristics of lonely children with LD? 
In this article, we summarize some of Dr. Margalit’s research on:

Loneliness among elementary school kids and adolescents 
Characteristics of kids with LD who are not lonely 
Effective approaches to helping the child with LD cope with or avoid loneliness. 
Loneliness among Elementary School Children with LD

When researchers study popularity and friendships in school settings, they often ask children to name several kids in their class they like and several they dislike. When two children name each other as a person they like, researchers refer to them as “identified friends.” Likewise, two kids who name each other as a person they dislike are termed “identified enemies.”

Using the identified-friend/enemy survey, Dr. Margalit’s research1 revealed that, within the group of children with LD, those who had at least one “identified enemy” in the class felt lonelier than kids with LD who had no identified enemies. However, among the kids without LD , those with an identified enemy did not feel lonelier than kids without an identified enemy. This finding reveals, Dr. Margalit says, the social and emotional vulnerability of students with LD, who, because they often have such limited social networks, attach greater importance to the negative attitudes of other kids toward them. In general, research shows that children with LD are more likely to experience social stresses such as loneliness, and are less likely to have the internal resources to cope effectively with them.

Interestingly, one of Dr. Margalit’s studies indicated that computer use predicted lower levels of loneliness for kids with LD. “We need to look more closely at whether children’s use of the Internet will challenge our traditional views of understanding what loneliness and friendship are,” Dr. Margalit commented. “Sometimes we are biased against technology, worried that children may neglect their face-to-face friendships in favor of virtual connections. I would like to encourage parents to think differently about e-friends and Web peers, since they may expand children’s social networks, enable them to try out their social skills, as well as give them a different sense of their social status.”

Loneliness among Adolescents with LD

Dr. Margalit conducted another study2 to determine whether social environment would have any impact on the prevalence of loneliness among teenagers with LD. She and her colleagues compared rates of loneliness between a mixed (with and without LD) group of teens living in an urban environment, and a comparable group of teens living on an Israeli kibbutz. Because the kibbutz is a highly communal living arrangement, some researchers predicted that kids with LD in this environment would be less likely than the urban kids with LD to experience loneliness. This was not the case. In fact, this and other studies showed that, across age and social setting, teenage kids with LD consistently reported higher levels of loneliness. They were also rated by their teachers as less socially adjusted, and by their peers as less accepted.

Not All Children with LD Are Lonely

In several studies of loneliness among children with LD, according to Dr. Margalit, a small group of kids with LD was identified who were not more likely to view themselves as lonely or socially distressed than were their peers without LD. Using a research approach that emphasizes identifying kids’ strengths, Dr. Margalit identified two characteristics common to the children with LD who were not lonelier than their peers without LD:

They had age-appropriate social skills. 
They had average scores on a survey that measures “sense of coherence.”3 
A child with a strong sense of coherence views the world both within and outside himself as ordered and predictable. When this child faces a problem, such as feeling isolated and out of touch with classmates, he is able to assess the problem and choose, from among a repertoire of social skills, an appropriate strategy to address it. For example, he might strike up a conversation with a classmate, using the strategy of identifying a mutual interest such as a recent movie, a television program, or a new computer game. Or the child might develop social relationships outside school, either in his neighborhood or through a hobby or a leisure activity that involves contact with other children.

Helping Children with LD Overcome Loneliness

Dr. Margalit cautions that parents may sometimes feel anxious while trying to help their child cope with loneliness. A child’s despair may bring back unpleasant memories of their own childhood experiences of loneliness. Dr. Margalit encourages parents to be aware of two important things:

Because they are role models for their child’s social behavior, they should reflect on and converse with their kids about their experiences in current and childhood friendships.

Parents can also model self-awareness and reflection on the positive and negative emotions associated with friendships. 
“When parents share with children the challenges they face in cultivating and maintaining friendships,” Dr. Margalit says, “children gain the hope and motivation they need to cope with their own social difficulties.”

Effective approaches to helping children with LD to overcome loneliness, according to Dr. Margalit, require both a carefully structured social environment and close attention to each child’s particular social skills and challenges. With the overarching goal of empowering the child with LD to improve his social relations with peers, Dr. Margalit emphasizes that successful interventions rely on a combination of approaches. Among these are:

Becoming knowledgeable about your child’s social life. Observe your child’s social behavior to determine specific strengths and weaknesses. For example, you might compare your child’s behavior in initiating and maintaining social contacts with those same behaviors among his peers. You might want to check your observations against those of your child’s teacher or coach, as well.

Structuring the environment to promote friendship and satisfactory relationships among kids, to provide them opportunities to experience social competence. For example, you might set up an opportunity for a lonely child to work collaboratively with another child on a task or project, being careful to select a child who is likely to work well with your child, and a task that they can successfully complete. Let your child’s teachers know that you are working with your child on friendship skills. The teacher can then structure the classroom environment to support his efforts to form satisfying social connections with classmates.

Providing training and intervention to promote children’s competence and sense of control. During Dr. Margalit’s study, children had the advantage of practicing social skills in the context of carefully structured training activities. To help children “transfer” these skills from the training sessions to the “outside” world, adults engaged children in conversations about how the social situations they faced in the training were similar to those in their lives. Individual children were asked to try out a particular social task in a real-life situation and report back on how it worked. The results were “quite promising,” Dr. Margalit says. Children became more active in initiating social contacts and planning social activities, and became less impulsive and less rejecting during social exchanges. Different types of social skills training were found to be effective:

Modeling 
Peer tutoring 
Role-playing 
Problem-solving exercises 
Problem-solving exercises were based on typical social scenarios that researchers developed based on children’s own reports of social challenges and disappointments. For example, “Dan sees his friends heading for the computer lab to play games, but Dan is not invited.” Children were asked, “If you were Dan, what could you do?” Children were asked to map out different options, evaluate the pros and cons of each, and choose one course of action. Predictably, some children suggested aggressive responses (“Yell at the kids!”), and others suggested passive responses (“Just don’t talk to them.”). Some kids suggested age-appropriate strategies such as inviting the group of kids to play a new computer game, or getting together with another child who wasn’t invited to join the activity.

Nurturing a child’s belief in his ability to develop better friendship skills. 4 For a child to cope effectively with stressors in his life such as loneliness, he requires ongoing empathy, encouragement, and problem-solving support from adults in order to:

View friendships and satisfying social relations as important. 
Develop the hope and motivation to persist in making friends.

Maintaining a positive attitude and accepting that kids may vary in the way they form friendships. You may feel sometimes that the social relationships your child is developing are childish or superficial or that your child’s friends are too young or not really a good match. By understanding that friendship skills take time and practice, you will be able to give your child the encouragement and support he needs to build these skills in his own way and at his own pace. 
Loneliness is distressing for anyone. For a child with LD, loneliness may become an ongoing struggle, resulting from a lack of social skills, or a belief that he cannot make and keep friends. As a parent, you can play an important role in identifying your child’s specific social strengths and challenges, and helping him understand that friendships require effort and skill. By doing so, you support his hopes for closer friendships and more meaningful social networks in the future.

Type

Public Private

Remembering You'r ABC's
by Caliboo818 on 06.02.08 - public

Remembering your ABC's
Avoid negativity.

Believe in yourself

Consider things from every angle.

Don't give up, and don't give in.

En...

Me Too! 0 High Five 1 Hilarious! 0 I'm Moved 0 Impressive 0

Title :

Description :

Remembering your ABC's
Avoid negativity.
 
Believe in yourself
 
Consider things from every angle.
 
Don't give up, and don't give in.
 
Enjoy life today; yesterday is gone and tomorrow may never come.
 
Family and friends are hidden treasures, seek them and enjoy their riches.
 
Give more than you planned to.
 
Hang on to your dreams.
 
Ignore those who try to discourage you.
 
Just do it!
 
Keep trying no matter how hard it seems; it will get easier.
 
Love yourself first and most.
 
Make it happen.
 
Never lie, cheat, or steal ~ always strike a fair deal.
 
Open your eyes and see things as they really are.
 
Practice makes perfect.
 
Quitters never win, and winners never quit.
 
Read, study, and learn about everything important in your life.
 
Stop procrastinating.
 
Take control of your own destiny.
 
Understand yourself in order to better understand others.
 
Visualize it.
 
Want it more than anything.
 
Xcellerate your efforts.
 
You are unique of all God's creations and cannot be replaced.
 
Zero in on your target, and go for it!

Type

Public Private

Eight Surprising Marriage Tips…From a Single Guy!
by Caliboo818 on 06.02.08 - public

Everywhere you look, someone is offering new secrets guaranteed to improve your love life. Some sell pills; some, advice. The travel industry shows yo...

Me Too! 0 High Five 2 Hilarious! 0 I'm Moved 0 Impressive 0

Title :

Description :

Everywhere you look, someone is offering new secrets guaranteed to improve your love life. Some sell pills; some, advice. The travel industry shows you radiant couples dancing on cruise ships. Doctors offer surgeries to enlarge or reduce whatever you desire. 
But do the latest products and promises really provide lasting happiness? Not if our nation’s staggering divorce rate tells us anything. We’re like children on monkey bars, jumping from one new idea to the next. When one gimmick fails, we swing on over to the next.

What if it isn’t a new technique we need, but new eyes? Sometimes, a second look at ancient wisdom reveals fresh, unexpected ideas.

Here’s an example: I recently caught the movie The Gospel of John — an incredible dramatization of Jesus' life and death. Seeing it word-for-word on the screen, I was startled to discover that Jesus was giving marriage tips. We know Christ's examples teach us how to treat our fellow man — but what if we apply the same ancient ideas to our relationship with a spouse? It just might work!

Here are eight things that single guy taught me about strengthening a marriage:

Uphold your spouse’s dignity. In John 2, Jesus attends a wedding where a social faux pas is about to go down. The refreshment is running out. Knowing how much this would embarrass the planning committee, He does a remarkable thing: He produces more, better wine. If Christ would go out of his way for strangers, how much more should we protect our spouse from humiliation? Sometimes, comments made in jest (particularly in front of others) can leave lasting scars. Ask your spouse: Do I always demonstrate respect for you?

Feed your spouse well. Jesus was forever confusing His disciples by talking about food they couldn’t see. Bread of life? Living water? I didn't see anyone bring him food — did you? We know Jesus meant that His teachings provided better nourishment than any earthly sustenance. What kind of eternal food are you feeding your spouse? Do you provide a healthy diet for him or her by making Christ’s words part of your conversation and lifestyle? Ask your spouse: Am I feeding you spiritually?

Don’t put off healing. Jesus got in big trouble with the Jewish leaders for fixing broken people on the Sabbath. Take the situation with the lame man. Jesus could have returned to the pool of Bethesda the next day; the guy probably would have been there. But Jesus loved people. . .and He wanted to prove that healing and compassion trump everything else. When we feel like holding grudges or sulking after a fight with a spouse, this story offers a reminder: Christ fixed things as soon as possible to restore joy to His people. Ask your spouse: Do I wait too long before making things right between us?

Wash each other’s feet. Jesus was a co-creator of the universe, a king, and a sinless man. But He put a towel around His waist and washed the dusty, desert-worn feet of His servants. Not a pleasant job, but someone had to do it. Can we find a greater example of humility anywhere in history? He set aside His pride and position to demonstrate love to a rag-tag band of sinful men. It's easy in marriage to keep score — to ensure that the work load is 50/50. Yet Christ gave all He had out of love. Ask your spouse: Am I humble and selfless when it comes to sharing the responsibility for this family?

Pray for unity with your spouse. If you knew you would die tonight, what information would you share with family and friends in your final moments? Maybe you’d discuss finances or division of property. Perhaps you’d say tearful goodbyes. During Jesus’ final hours, He prayed. And the focus of his prayer? Unity. It’s clear that oneness took precedence in His mind over nearly everything else. We preach unity in church, but what about at home? Do we pray that the Lord will bring us together on issues of disagreement to restore peace in the family? Ask your spouse: On what issues do we need to achieve greater harmony?

Prove your love. . .even when you don’t have to. In John 20:25, Thomas stubbornly proclaims, "Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my fingers where the nails were and put my hands into his side, I will not believe it." If I were Jesus, I would have been indignant. I’ve shown them so many miracles! I’ve fed crowds and raised the dead. If he doesn’t believe me, that’s his problem! But a few verses later, Jesus gives Thomas exactly what he asked for. Out of love, He goes the extra mile to relieve His friend’s doubts. Ask your spouse: Do you ever question my feelings for you? How can I show my love more effectively?

Forgive gracefully. Imagine you’re Peter. Sure, it’s great to see Jesus alive again — but you denied Him. You disowned the person you love the most, and you did it three times in a row! Wouldn’t you wonder where you stood? In John 21:15, Jesus asks Peter, "Do you love me?" Peter answers with an emphatic yes. But Jesus asks him twice more. Peter was probably thinking, "How many times do I have to say it?" Then it hits him — once for each time he’d denied his Lord. Jesus doesn’t say "I told you so." He doesn’t make Peter grovel. He settles the score gently, leaving Peter's dignity intact. Ask your spouse: Do I forgive gracefully, or do I sometimes hold grudges and seek revenge?

Surrender your marriage to God. Over and over, Jesus tells the people, "The son can do nothing without the father." If the son — part of the trinity and co-author of creation — couldn’t function without God, what makes us think we can handle our marriages on our own? It’s imperative that we consult with our father like Jesus did, gaining strength, understanding and healing from a source much more powerful than anything of this earth. Ask your spouse: Can we pray together that God will remain in the center of our marriage?
Jesus never had a wife, but he was — and is — the perfect example in matters of the heart. Before you buy another book or read one more magazine article on relationships, reconsider the volume that may already be sitting on your nightstand. Pray for guidance as you scour its pages, and know that it is living and active, waiting to speak to you.

You never know what new tips you’ll discover when you pick up an old book handed down from the world's foremost expert on love.

Type

Public Private

Facing Trials Head-on
by Caliboo818 on 05.29.08 - public

Life offers many challenges, the ultimate being death itself. We are sometimes called upon to face pain, suffering, loss, and grief that may seem impo...

Me Too! 0 High Five 1 Hilarious! 0 I'm Moved 3 Impressive 0

Title :

Description :

Life offers many challenges, the ultimate being death itself. We are sometimes called upon to face pain, suffering, loss, and grief that may seem impossible to handle. Prayer gives us hope and keeps us moving. Here is a formula you may use to help overcome. When confronted with a trial of any kind: 
1. Face it. 
2. Life it.
3. Commit it.
4. Release it.

Let's look at each of these in more detail:

1. Face it. One thing that adds enormous pressure to an already tense situation is our inability to face realistically what may be happening to us. We may be:

Fearful of the outcome
Unwilling to believe the facts
Embarrassed by the conditions
Protective of ourselves or others

Denying or avoiding a problem that requires action on our part is never helpful. Research has shown that people who do this regularly end up not coping as well. Studies of both college students and sick older adults demonstrate that those who approach their problems by avoidance and denial experience less well-being overall, compared to those who face their problems.

2. Lift it. After facing up to the real facts of what is happening in your life or someone else's, or in the conditions around you, and having done everything you know or can do with the help of thers, you must then lift these facts above yourself to God in prayer. At that point you make a full and complete disclosure of your needs. It is helpful to name them one by one. God does not need this recitation, but doing so strengthens us. We admit to ourselves that we cannot do it alone and we are asking God for help.

3. Commit it. Having faced it and lifted it to God, we commit it. We take it out of our hands and hand it over to God. The solution to the problem will be through us from God's divine will for our lives. This commitment should be without any reserves. It is handed over in faith that God will handle it.

4. Release it. Having faced it, lifted it, and committed it, we must release it. We may not be able to forget it, but we should release it and no longer worry about it.

Type

Public Private

A Butterfly's Lesson
by Caliboo818 on 05.29.08 - public

A Butterfly's Lesson

One day a small opening appeared in a cocoon. A man sitting nearby watched fro the butterfly for several hours as it strug...

Me Too! 0 High Five 0 Hilarious! 0 I'm Moved 2 Impressive 1

Title :

Description :

A Butterfly's Lesson

One day a small opening appeared in a cocoon. A man sitting nearby watched fro the butterfly for several hours as it struggled to force its body through that little hole.

Then it seemed to stop making progress. It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could and could go no further so the man decided to help the butterfly.,

He took a pair of scissors and opened the cocoon.

The butterfly then emerged easily.

But it had a withered body and tiny, shrivelled wings.

The man continued to watch because he expected that at any moment the wings would open, enlarge and expand to be able to support the butterfly's body and become firm.

Neither happened. Infact, the butterfly spent the rest of its life crawling around with a withered body and shrivelled wings.

It never was able to fly.

What the man in his kindness and good will did not understand was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the tiny opening were nature's way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon.

Sometimes struggles are what we need in life.

If we are allowed to go through our lives without any obstacles it would cripple us.

We would not be as strong as we could have been – never able to fly.

I asked for strength and was given difficulties to make me strong

I asked for wisdom and was given problems to solve

I asked for prosperity and was given a brain and brawn to work with

I asked for courage and was given obstacles to overcome

I asked for love and was given troubled people to help

I asked for favours and was given opportunities

I received nothing I wanted but everything I needed.

Live life without fear, confront all obstacles and know you can overcome them.

With money you can buy a house but not a home

With money you can buy a clock but not time

With money you can buy a bed but not sleep

With money you can buy a book but not knowledge

With money you can buy a doctor but not good health

With money you can buy position but not respect

With money you can buy a blood but not life

With money you can buy a sex but not love

Luck cannot buy Luck
Author unknown

Type

Public Private

Are u ready for battle
by Caliboo818 on 05.27.08 - public

Autism is a battle that requires a lot of armor.
Your faithful stead(your vechicle) to get you to the meetings so voice your child opinions and get y...

Me Too! 1 High Five 3 Hilarious! 0 I'm Moved 0 Impressive 1

Title :

Description :

Autism is a battle that requires a lot of armor.
Your faithful stead(your vechicle) to get you to the meetings so voice your child opinions and get your child what he needs.
 For the many trips to the Dr's office, the Nuero for the seizures, to make sure your child/children are gettng the proper care they need.
 Head gear for all of the things we have to learn and keep imbeded in our brains. Vest to let the crazy things people say to us bounce off and not penetrate our our to the point we let our emotions get the best of us.
 Or not be happy when a friend or our child's show a bit of progress, instead of congragulating them and saying if your son/daughter can do it so can I no matter how long it takes.
 Your boots to kick in doors that lay closed with the things your child/children are intitled to FAPE, Stay Put Claus, regulated IEP, Adaptive PE etc.

The teachers who dont want to teach you'r child for it takes up to much of their time, or refer to your child as "one of those people"
You'r spear to poke holes in the lies they will tell you, how you cant get the services your child is entitled it, or how they dont have the funding in the budget.
And then the big cup of Pepsi or drink of your choice to celebrate the victory at the end
So mommie and daddies are you ready?

Type

Public Private

FOTUK
by Caliboo818 on 05.26.08 - public

When I say this people look at me strange and say what does this mean. FOTUK its means Fear Of The Uknown people who dont know about special needs suc...

Me Too! 1 High Five 3 Hilarious! 0 I'm Moved 0 Impressive 0

Title :

Description :

When I say this people look at me strange and say what does this mean. FOTUK its means Fear Of The Uknown people who dont know about special needs such as Autism, Aspergers, Downs Syndrome etc. Instead of trying to be informed by reading, asking questions so they can be updated with all of the new and improved imformation they much rather judge us as parents, or live in the stones ages when parents use to lock their kids away hoping and praying things will get better. FOTUK cause incidents like the one where the teacher had the kids vote a classmate out due to his Aspergers, FOTUK have people saying our kids are bad due to bad parenting skills when our kids are having meltdowns and we have to explain to them no non informed person its not bad parenting its called Autism etc. FOTUK applies to teachers, School Districts who dont want to teach our children for they dont have the patience, nor the correct knowlegde but enjoy the funding perks they receive from our kids disabilities. FOTUK applies to relatives who say no your child does not have a disability you just spoil them, or dont want them at family functions for they are not good enough to play with their kids, or think that Autism, Aspergers, ADD/ADHD/PDD ect is like a cold you can catch it if your child touches or sneezes on their.
How can we stop FOTUK we continue to spread the word, we continue to fight, we continue to standup for our kids and kids like them.
WE LET THEM KNOW FOTUK CAN BE CURED IF YOU JUST ASK US TO HELP YOU UNDERSTAND

Type

Public Private

What is God's purpose
by Caliboo818 on 05.21.08 - public

God's purpose behind your problems
Life is a series of problem-solving opportunities. The problems you face will either defeat you or develop you - ...

Me Too! 0 High Five 1 Hilarious! 0 I'm Moved 1 Impressive 1

Title :

Description :

God's purpose behind your problems
Life is a series of problem-solving opportunities. The problems you face  will either defeat you or develop you - depending on how you respond to them. Unfortunately most people fail to see how God wants to use problems for good in their lives. They react foolishly and resent their problems rather than pausing to consider what benefit 
they might bring. Here are five ways God wants to use the problems in your life:

1. God uses problems to DIRECT you. Sometimes God must light a fire under you to get you moving. Problems often point us in a new direction and motivate us to change. Is God trying to get your attention? "Sometimes it takes a painful situation to make us change our ways." Pr. 20 :30 (GN)

2. God uses problems to INSPECT you. People are like tea bags... if you want to know what's inside them, just drop them into hot water! Has God ever tested your faith with a problem? What do problems reveal about you? "When you have many kinds of troubles, you should be full of joy, because you know that these troubles test your faith, and this will give you patience." James 1:2-3 (NCV)

3. God uses problems to CORRECT you. Some lessons we learn only through pain and failure. It's likely that as a child your parents told you not to touch a hot stove. But you probably learned by being burned. Sometimes we only learn the value of something... health, money, a relationship ... by losing it. "... It was the best thing that could have happened to me, for it taught me to pay attention to your laws." Ps 119:71-72 (LB)

4. God uses problems to PROTECT you. A problem can be a blessing in disguise if it prevents you from being harmed by something more serious. Last year a friend was fired for refusing to do something unethical that his boss had asked him to do. His unemployment was a problem - but it saved him from being convicted and sent to prison a year later when management's actions were eventually discovered. "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good..." Gen 50:20 (NIV)

5. God uses problems to PERFECT you. Problems, when responded to correctly, are character builders. God is far more interested in your 
character than your comfort. Your relationship to God and your character are the only two things you're going to take with you into eternity. "We can rejoice when we run into problems ...they help us learn to be patient. And patience develops strength of character in us and helps us trust God more each time we use it until finally our hope and faith are strong and steady." Rom. 5:3-4 (LB)

Here's the point: God is at work in your life - even when you do not recognize it or understand it! But it's much easier and profitable when you cooperate with Him!

Type

Public Private

Because sometimes its good to say it out loud!
by Caliboo818 on 04.15.08 - public

A good friend of mine in our group posted this message and asked all of the parents to leave their thoughts.
You are all remarkable women!!!! Life m...

Me Too! 2 High Five 0 Hilarious! 0 I'm Moved 3 Impressive 0

Title :

Description :

A good friend of mine in our group posted this message and asked all of the parents to leave their thoughts.
You are all remarkable women!!!!  Life may not have turned out the way we expected it to...maybe it did...maybe in some ways it turned out better....maybe there are days it really doesn't feel like that but I'm sure those days do come....like maybe the first day your child showed you that he or she really got something, like signed or said I love you....wrote their name....rode a bike....caught a ball....laughed at a joke....played appropriately....picked up thier toys.....did thier homework.....just lived life to the best of thier abilities....I'm sure that you've seen miracles in your everyday life that you may have never noticed before....and sometimes we need to remember it....or say it out loud!
 
So...why not do that!
 
Tell us about your child & how you feel about things yesterday(past)....today(present) and tomorrow(future)...as much or as little as you like....
Yesterday he was a little boy with a pacifer in his mouth and a sippy cup in his hand, He would listen to I beleive I could fly as he swayed back and forth with out  a care in the  world. He would sit in his room for hours and not be bothered with anyone. He only spoke one sentence then went silent as a lamb.  He was almost taken from us at eight month due to asthma, he would echolia all that you said to him, he didnt like to be touched only if he started it first, he didnt like the loud noises that came his way.  He was diagnosed with Autism at the age of two where most parents would be complaining omg why is my child so disruptive oh its that terrible two's we would say what is wrong with him he is not like the other kids were at that age.   He was diagnosed at the age of 10 with Absence seizures oh lawd why my baby hasent she suffered enough?  He would never let you know or couldnt let you know when things were wrong for Autism had taken away his voice.
 
Today he is a fighter he has taught us that no matter how many hard balls life throws at us we have to knock them out the park. Today he gave his graduation speech form 6th grade and standing ovation, to day he smiles and his laughter is contagious. Today he can tell me he wants to buy a sheep on line, he is the top reader in his class, even though comprehension is his worse enemy. Today he can tell me how he feels even when he doctors on himself sigh. Today he can tell when a person dosent like him or still try to be friendly to those who choose to mistreat him. Today he can play Chop Sticks on the Piano with his mommy, reciet movie lines with this dad, conspire with is sisters against his parents and can embarress me in the car while driving and listening to Cotten Eyed joe on full blast as people in cars drive by and laugh. He loves to play video games and can use 4 controlers at one time, he loves to be on the computer looking up cheat codes or  hit me up on im and say "Hey stop stalking me sigh. He stands out side of the bathroom door and hollers BOOOO and scares us out of our wit today he enjoys blue gatorade, grilled cheese sandwiches, sponge bob, cat dog, and his mp3 player.
 
Tomorrow I am scared that if anything happends to me my son may be lost, tomorrow I pray that all that I have instilled in his heart, and mind and those around him will guide them in case somethings happends to me. Tomorrow I pray that he will graduate from High School and go off to College and be a successful young man being able to live on his own. Tomorrow I hope he will still be able to say Hey Momma I am so proud to be your son

Type

Public Private

Our Supporters