State: MS
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Member since: Oct 22, 2007
Last logged in: Dec 01, 2008
I am Maranie, mom to Dean who is 12 and has autism. He is my angel and has the prettiest eyes and the greatest laugh I have ever heard~! I am also mom to Zack, 20 - a Junior at Mississippi College, and Jackson , 17- a Senior at West Jones High School, and have been happily married to their dad Bruce, for twenty years now! I have a wonderful support network- especially my Mom. She and I own and co moderate a yahoo support group called chelatingkids2. She has been in the trenches with me since day one to help Dean. She loves him so much and fights for him every day! She is also the VP of The National Autism Association. I am very thankful and very lucky to have her in my life. A wise woman once told me that treating autism is not a sprint-- but a marathon. Truer words have never been spoken! We have been at this eight years and still going strong! AUTISM IS TREATABLE!! I am proud to be a part of this new community and look forward to getting to know you all ....
Favorite Compositions (0)
Maranie's Compositions
by Maranie on 10.24.07 - public - 78 visits
Its just one of those frickin days when no matter how you try to stay 'up'-- it just ain't happenin! so I am giving in to it and just being tired. Dean has had a rough up and down couple of months and although he is somewhat at a better place, it breaks my heart to see him have to struggle. Why isn't he one of the lucky recovered ones??? We have been doing this for seven years and I thought we'd be done now. He was supposed to be NORMAL now... sigh..... or at least talking. I am tired of thinking, figuring, playing doctor, advocate, babysitter, nurse, and teacher. I just want to be the Mom ! UGH.... sorry this is such a negative rant-- my first blog and I am just not a happy camper. But it feels good to write it down... I know we are blessed and that the road we've taken with all the biomedical treatments has brought him from a severely autistic child to a mild/moderate one-- and I love him so much that it hurts. I just ache for what he could have been-- ache to hear him talk to me again-- ache to see him interact and play again.... I will never give up and will always fight the fight and always have hope--- but for today--- I am tired.
Comments(3)
asdmom
Posted on Fri, 26 Oct 2007
Hi Maranie, Like you, we have been at this for many years. Ryan is also 11 and we started biomed at 3-1/2. While he is far from recovered, he is 1000% better. When he has tough days, I just keep trying to remember how far he's come. I think we all get tired, worn out...mentally & physically. We're now just heading into puberty AND thinking about middle school. Sigh. Sometimes we all just need to take an autism break and let things slide so that we don't get burned out. Take care of yourself. Cheryl
shannonj
Posted on Thu, 25 Oct 2007
Thanks for sharing....I think we can all relate to some degree and understand your angst. Hang in there and just take it one day at a time.. Peace
janneane7
Posted on Tue, 23 Oct 2007
Dear Maranie Your post touched my heart. I know exactly how you feel. My son is 22 (had his birthday saturday) and still is serioulsy challenged by his autism. I have thought a thousand time over the years that if anyone had ever told me when he was 3 or 5 or 8 or even 10 how stinkin hard this would be, and that Andy would stil be so challenged as an adult I would have jumped off a bridge or something. Still it is better I didn't know what the this rough road would really be like. Right now we are going through our own private hell, once again, with Andrew having to leave school the day he turned 22, and "transition" him to adult services (which is basically adult day care with no knowledge of autism!) UGH!!!!!!!!!! I am faced once again, with starting all over, and having to advocate and fight and trying to change and extremely entrenched system. it is exhaustimg me and I spend way too much time with tears in my eyes. (he was in an AWESOME school program for 10 years with teachers who adored him and REALLY CARED about him and about our family. Anyway, I didn't mean to rant back at you. I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone at all. That there are others like me who understand your exhaustion and exasperation! Jan
